


Barbara Dex

by Telemoveis (JinkiesSelassie)



Category: Eurovision Song Contest RPF, Music RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, ESC, Gen, One World Government
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 16:36:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18319133
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JinkiesSelassie/pseuds/Telemoveis
Summary: Those robots were everywhere. That was just the way the world was now. The robots were there to monitor everyone. Everyone had their own social score. Drop too low, and the robots would shoot you. That's just how the One World Government got rid of "undesirables." All sorts of things could lower your social score, but nothing tanked your social credit score quite like receiving the Barbara Dex Award in Eurovision. (Eurovision 2018 AU)





	Barbara Dex

The members of Eye Cue, Bojan, Marija and Ivo, hoped they weren't too late as they ran over to the building. They ran and ran until they saw them. As soon they saw the robots in the distance, they slowed down their pace. After all, if the robots saw you running it was seen as bad. They'd ask why you were running so quickly. They might even lower your social score for such a thing. For something as simple as running in the street. Eye Cue tried to keep it together as the three of them walked slowly past the floating robots with the big red eyes.  
"Social credit check, complete," said one of the robots, allowing Eye Cue to walk into the building. Those robots were everywhere. That was just the way the world was now. The robots were there to monitor everyone. Everyone had their own social score. Drop too low, and the robots would shoot you. That's just how the One World Government got rid of "undesirables." All sorts of things could lower your social score, but nothing tanked your social credit score quite like receiving the Barbara Dex Award in Eurovision. Even those who came last in the final, even those who came last in the semis, even those with zero points... they didn't lose as much credit as the Barbara Dex "winners." Even with that risk, the boost to your score from performing in Eurovision was worth it to a lot of people.  
Today was the day. The day that the Barbara Dex winner would be announced. One unlucky country would be the "winner" and have their social score considerably lowered. It had all come down to five. Across the world, people had been voting for who they thought should "win" the award and now they were down to the final five. These were the five Barbara Dex nominations. The representatives of these five possible countries had been called to the EBU head office in Lisbon immediately. They all complied, they knew what would happen if they tried to run away. They had seen the result of that the year before. In 2017, Triana Park were one of the nominations. Instead of going to the EBU office, they ran away. The robots had found them cowering behind a bus shelter... and they were never seen again. They hadn't even won the Barbara Dex that year, Slavko Kalezić had. They didn't even need to run away. What a waste. Running from it was hopeless. The best thing to do was to turn up and hope that you weren't the winner.  
The representatives of the five countries stood on the stage. All nervous, all hoping that it wasn't them who had won the "award."  
The nominations were Netta from Israel, Eye Cue from Macedonia, Vanja Radovanović from Montenegro, Jessica Mauboy from Australia and Sennek from Belgium. Some were surprised to see Netta's name in the list. Netta... who had won the Eurovision Song Contest. If she won the Barbara Dex, she would lose all of the good credit points she received from her victory. Still, the voters in the Barbara Dex thought that her outfit was worthy of a place in the top five.  
"G-guys..." Vanja said, trying to remain calm but clearly failing at it, "No matter what happens today, I'm glad I met all of you."  
"Hey," Netta said, "We'll be fine, you'll be fine, try not to worry, ok."  
"A-alright, sorry," Vanja said, "I'm just... it's just, I guess we're all a bit of a mess right now."  
"Look," Netta said, "I'll make sure that no matter what happens, everyone here is fine, ok?"  
Netta seemed very calm compared to the others. Maybe because she had just won the contest. Maybe she was sure that it wouldn't be her. Suddenly, they all fell silent as the door opened and Jon Ola Sand walked into the room. He simply looked at the entrants, before unfolding a sheet of paper. Jessica Mauboy hadn't said anything the entire time they were all in that room, but she was shaking and visibly nervous, they could all see it. Jon Ola ignored the worried looks on the contestants and simply sat in his chair in front of the stage.  
"It is unfortunate that I must make this announcement today," Jon Ola said solemnly, "But the World Government has said that this is a necessity. I will do what I must. The loser... erm... winner, of this award shall have one thousand points removed from their social credit score."  
At that, Jessica Mauboy screamed and fell to the floor.  
"One... thousand...?" Jessica said, "But sir, I only have four hundred points... please..."  
"I know, and that is rather unfortunate," Jon Ola said, "If you drop into negative points, the watching eyes shall deal with you."  
The watching eyes. That was the World Government's name for the floating robots.  
"Please no," Jessica said as the other entrants tried to calm her down.  
"Jessica, do be quiet," Jon Ola said, "I haven't even announced the winner yet. It might not even be you."  
Jon Ola Sand looked down at the piece of paper he was holding. You could hear a pin drop as the contestants waited anxiously to know the result. Why wouldn't he just announce it already? Why was he making them all wait like this? Netta thought that he was enjoying this.  
"And the winner is..." Jon Ola said finally, his voice dripping with sarcasm, "It's Eye Cue from Macedonia. Oh dear. Such a shame."  
Eye Cue looked at Jon Ola in horror as he said this.  
"Well," Jon Ola continued, "At least it wasn't Netta. I can't tell you how embarrassing it would be for us if the actual Eurovision winner won this too. It would also wipe out the one thousand points she gained for winning the contest, and we can't have that. Anyway, Eye Cue, you lose a thousand points."  
"Jon... please," Marija said, "Don't do it. We only have three hundred points between us, you can't, you-"  
Jon Ola almost looked sad at hearing that. The sarcasm was just his way of dealing with the fact that once a year he had to basically order someone's death, and sometimes multiple people. Still, the World Government had asked this of him, and he was not going to let them down. In his mind, he was just doing what they wanted. The first few years of Barbara Dex, he genuinely felt upset at what he was doing, but now... let's just say he was good at disconnecting himself from what he was doing.  
"The World Government demands it," Jon Ola Sand said as he pressed a button, "Oh dear. The social score of all three of you has hit the negative. You know what that means. Well, we won't be seeing you again, do say your goodbyes if you even have time for that."  
With that Jon Ola Sand walked out of the room, leaving the representatives from the five countries to stand on the stage. Sennek felt bad that she was relieved. She wouldn't have her score removed, but for Eye Cue the nightmare was only just beginning. Bojan looked at the watch on his arm, the watch everyone has, the one that shows you your social credit score. He felt sick when he saw the number. -856. Any negative number was bad but this would be impossible to raise quickly. And those robots were everywhere, they would attack anyone who had a negative score. To put it simply, Eye Cue were screwed. They looked around, trying to think of an escape plan but coming up with nothing. As it stood, leaving this building meant instant death.  
"You need to get out of here," Jessica said.  
Bojan looked out of the window.  
"How?" Bojan said, "The whole place is surrounded by... them."  
Netta looked outside to see that he was right. Hundreds of the robots were flying, swarming around the building.  
"As soon as we go outside, we-" Ivo began but couldn't finish the sentence.  
It was Netta's turn to lead. She had a plan for this moment.  
"I think there's a secret passageway," Netta said, "When I was here for my victory speech I saw Christer Björkman use a door that I'd never seen before."  
"Netta! You can't," Sennek said, "We can't help them... we can't or we'll be targets too!"  
"Nonsense," Netta said, "They'll never know we did it. Eye Cue, come with us."  
"Right," Vanja said, "We have to help them! That could have been any of us! And Sennek, if you had been chosen, you would have wanted us to help you, right?"  
"O-of course," Sennek said, looking down at her shoes, trying to avoid looking at the other contestants.  
"Right, so it's settled," Netta said, as Eye Cue looked at each other nervously. Surely there was no way that whatever Netta's plan was could work, right? No one had ever bested the World Government before, they would always be the ones to come out on top. Still, they had to try, this was their last chance. They all followed Netta through a corridor, hoping that Jon Ola Sand wasn't still around, that he or anyone else that worked at the EBU wouldn't catch them. Luckily, the building seemed deserted. That was lucky. Eventually, Netta came to a bookcase.  
"It was this bookcase right here," Netta said, "Christer took out one of the books and the bookcase moved to the side, revealing a door. The only problem is, I don't remember which book it was."  
"Then we have to take out all of these books," Vanja said, "Let's just try different ones until we get it."  
"Good idea Vanja," Netta said as she reached for one of the books and tossed it to the floor. This was going to be difficult. Even with all of them pulling out books, there were just so many of them. Eye Cue hoped that they would have enough time, that they could find the book that revealed the secret entrance quickly enough to get out of here. But even if they did, even if they did that, where would they go? What would they do? They couldn't be anywhere where those robots were around, which was most of the world seeing as the World Government existed everywhere. But that would have to be something they worried about at a later time. For now, all they needed was enough time to pull out these books.


End file.
